More insights from turning 50!

The second insight is the realization that a lot of the hard work I have done springs from the motivation of greed! I am greedy for more accomplishment, for more fulfillment, for more recognition. Understanding this is very helpful now in evaluating what the Lord would have me do or not do.

The third insight I am embarrassed to even mention, as it reveals the innate self-centeredness of my being. It is now clear that I will never accomplish or become the things I had dreamed of, such as being successful and well known as Chuck Colson or Chuck Swindoll. I have to settle for a smaller sphere of responsibility—and that is good, for it helps me focus on what the Lord has for me, rather than toying with thoughts of grandeur.

Fourth is a simple truth that my dear wife has been telling me for years: take time to recover. I have always run from one event to the next. Now I am beginning to see how I have sinned in not taking a regular Sabbath to rest and be restored. This past Sunday, after a nice afternoon of reading, I went to prepare some tea for myself and noticed that the dishes needed to be washed. I washed them and enjoyed it! Always before this activity has raised my inner tension because the goal was to get it over with and move on to more important items. Today I enjoyed the warm water and the warm feeling of doing something nice for my wife. I am amazed at how God is changing me.

What does all this mean? God is moving me towards His mindset where life is more a rhythm than a race. Take time to savor things, especially relationships; work hard when there’s work to be done, but don’t let the wrong motives of greed, self-centered fulfillment and the desire for glory dictate my decisions; take time to be refreshed and restored, like taking a walk by a brook like in the picture here. Simple, isn’t it? Too bad it took me fifty years to learn it!

I am looking forward to the next decade of walking with God, if Jesus does not rapture us first. I think it is going to be much more of His working through me in quiet ways than me accomplishing much. And that’s good because the glory needs to go to Him!

Prayer: “Lord, help me today to walk in the fear of you that I may be wise. Help me to choose to act out of godly motives, to do the work you have for me, not more. Help me to savor relationships and rest in you, for your glory. Amen.”